A New Beginning

Well. Here I am, 1800 miles away from home, in a dorm room. Hall fifteen, to be precise. Yes, college. It's strangely exhilarating. Or, rather, it was so, initially. I remember walking through the campus not three weeks ago, and feeling so many things at once. I was just so overwhelmed by the whole thing. It is, after all, a dream come true.

College is just so many things. There's just so much. Not just to do, but to get used to. And moving to a new country for college is definitely not easy. Especially if you're a slow adjuster like I am. I mean, college just makes you understand how big this world really is. It's totally out of your comfort zone, and you're no longer in this place where everyone knows you, knows all about you. In high school, you just feel more defined. You're THIS kind of person, with THESE friends, who's good at THIS, and who has THESE qualities. And you know that, everyone else knows that, everyone is happy and life goes on. But college is a completely different ball game. Unless you're someone who is really outgoing, or someone who's fortunate enough to have brought along a whole truck load of friends from back home, you end up feeling pretty lost.

Honestly, I'm still feeling quite lost. And seeing bunches of people around me who seem to have smoothly transitioned to this whole new life, while I still seem to be wandering helplessly, doesn't really help the cause. Yes, everyone is different, and some people just take their time (like moi), but sometimes you wish that things could just fall into place, and FAST. Once things do fall into place, everything is definitely going to seem much easier, much more comfortable and relaxed. If they do ever fall into place, that is!

I don't mean to rant about college. Honestly, I couldn't have hoped for a better university. Everything here is brilliant, definitely, undoubtedly. Maybe I'm just being too cynical. After all, it is my fault, for being so reserved and lost and all. But leaving SO much behind, back home, and coming here and feeling like you have nothing, can be quite shocking. It really gets to you. And you just end up wondering what on earth made you leave behind all those people you love.

And then you realise that it's okay, really. You might not have your old friends, but you can always make new ones. Even if you're someone like me, who takes eons to build relationships, it's okay. It will happen, eventually. College isn't just about making friends instantly, it's also about learning who the right kinds of friends are, and even if it takes a while, it will be worth it in the end, definitely. College is also about teaching yourself how to be independent. And SO many more things, really.

I guess you end up learning a lot along the way, and even if the initial few weeks are tough, things will fall into place, eventually. (Hopefully?)